DISCLAIMER / TERMS-CONDITIONS / STUB FROTH.COM / RMĢÏ, S.Á.

Welcome to the circus. Before you clutch your pearls, here’s the fine print.

1. This Is Satire.
   Everything you read here is commentary, parody, exaggeration, mockery, and general cultural lampooning. It is not news reporting, not fact-checked journalism, and not intended to be taken as literal truth. If you come here looking for “objectivity,” you wandered into the wrong tent.
2. The First Amendment Is My Bodyguard.
   Satire is protected speech. Case law, history, and the ghost of Lenny Bruce all agree: you may not like it, but you can’t sue it away. What you see here is opinion — sharp, sarcastic, caustic opinion — wrapped in the absurd.
3. Characters & Caricatures.
   Real names may appear. Public figures are skewered. Caricatures are exaggerated. If you think you’ve been “portrayed unfairly,” congratulations: that’s what parody is. If you don’t want to be roasted, get out of the kitchen.
4. No Medical, Legal, Financial, or Life Advice.
   If you remodel your portfolio, fire your lawyer, or divorce your spouse based on something you read here, you are dumb. That’s on you, not me.
5. Reader Responsibility.
   Critical thinking is required. If you can’t tell the difference between satire and reality, put this down, step away from the internet, and go find a coloring book.
6. Offense Is Not Damages.
   Being offended is not a lawsuit. Hurt feelings are not currency. If sarcasm ruins your day, unsubscribe and go hug a pillow.
7. Grit Wick - staff scribbler, RMĢÏ, S.Á. 
   Signatures, sketches, mastheads, and scribbles bearing “Grit Wick” are satirical artistic marks. They’re part of the performance, not a product guarantee.